Grace is more precious than Hot Chocolate

             We were on a date to Panera, my oldest and I.  It was just weeks before my third child was born, and I wanted to take special time with her while her sister was at preschool.  So I had been taking her to Panera  when I could.  My plan was to get a little treat, and then help her through some school work so that I could count it as "productive" time, you know, some phonics pages, writing letters to friends, math worksheets.  Usually, we would get there later than I had planned and by the time we finished our special treat, we only had time for me to read to her, and she loved that too.


      Now, you have to know me to know how hard I was trying to make these times special.  I would order a hot chocolate (with two cups, so that we could share) and then let Evangeline pick any pastry she wanted.  No restrictions, no comments about wanting her to eat a good lunch later, no guiding remarks toward the most inexpensive item such as, "Don't those bagels look great?"  This is me being really, really generous. (Yikes, huh?)  But it's not like I was going to get her a hot chocolate of her own though, because it would be too hot and she wouldn't finish it anyway - not money well spent, so we can share.
      So, this particular day, we sit down with our pastry and hot chocolate and bag of books and since the hot chocolate is too hot at first we take some time to unpack our things, get situated, and she starts eating her treat.  I take a few little sips, it's still too hot for her.  Finally, it is cool enough for her to try it.  She has one sip, loves it, and then promptly drops the entire cup.  It spills all over the table and her dress and the booth where she sits.  
      She looks up at me, astonished, afraid, and so sad, "I'm so sorry, Mama, I really didn't mean to, I'm so sorry, can we get another one? Please can we get another one?"


     Here I have a choice to make.  Regrettably, I have gotten upset at her for spilling something before, and I knew that I had no reason to do that now (as if I ever did.)  But I have been looking for ways to say "yes" to her more often and show her grace.  Most of the time, I am afraid that my response to a request like this for another one is based on a desire to teach her consequences.  You  dropped the hot chocolate, so now there is no more hot chocolate. That's just too bad. (Let's not forget that this was MY hot chocolate too!)  Maybe next time you'll be more careful.
     But this time I chose grace.  I told her that I would go buy her another one.  I did explain, "Well, Honey, we will have to go pay for another one, they don't just give us a new one just because we spilled this one."  Yeah, I'm filled with grace...


      I go to the counter, and I explain what happened.  (No, they did not offer to replace it for free - I gave the lady a chance to make the offer...)  I ask for a new hot chocolate and get out my money.  Another $2.50.  So I have now spent $5 on hot chocolate today and only have a few sips to show for it.  $2.50 for a new one!  
After my self-congratulations for having been "so generous" to even get her these things to begin with, I am experiencing slight shortness of breath to still be giving and giving to her - this daughter of mine who spills things.  And then I have this thought:
  "This grace stuff sure is expensive."  


Expensive.  This $2.50 hot chocolate is expensive grace.  Hmmmm.  


      Immediately, it hits me that, yes, grace is expensive.  Always.  And the One who gives grace abundantly paid for it most dearly.  Christ's blood shed for me, the cost of my sin, and the price to buy me into His family and make me His daughter, there is nothing more expensive.  Nothing more costly than the blood of the Prince of Heaven, the flesh of the Son of the Most High God. 
        And this grace, it keeps flowing, minute by minute, new mercies every morning.  To me.  And I spill stuff all the time.  I spill my words, angry thoughtless words.  I spill my faithless worry and fear.  I spill jealousy and pride all over myself  every. single. day.    And that grace, that expensive grace, it just keeps coming.  By faith in Jesus, who was never as careless as I am, this grace is mine.  And by grace, I can share it with my little ones too.


Maybe this hot chocolate isn't quite as pricey.