How I'm Doing So Far - Continued

Continuing to review my goals for the year, the next one is:


"Bible Study - be more contemplative, meditate on verses, pray more through Scripture. Possibly use the Fighter Verse set that I have to memorize more Scripture."

Well, I have stuck with the Bible reading plan on biblegateway.com.  I have been listening to my ipod, so even when I have been a little behind, that has helped me catch up.  I have tried to be more contemplative, etc., but I still have a long way to go in that area.  Using a Bible reading plan puts me at risk of just reading so that I can check off my list the reading for the day, rather than seeing my time in the Word as my number one source of nourishment and power.  I have not used the Fighter Verse set at all this year, so that will definitely go on next year's list.  I am convinced of the power of Scripture memorization, so I hope that one day that will show in how I plan my studying.

The real struggle I have had this year is that I have had no external accountability to push me to truly dig and wallow in the Truth.  This is the first year since I have been a believer that I have not been involved in a Bible study of some kind.  I chose not to participate in the women's study at our church that had stretched me the most from a studying and preparing perspective.  Due to schedule conflicts with juggling children, we are not currently in a small group Bible study as a couple and even our Sunday School teaching time has been limited this year.  And my friend Meg and I haven't been studying the Bible together as much either since she decided to grow all up on me and is now leading a group of girls on her own.  ( I still love her anyway... :)  )
All that to say: I can do better.  I want to do better.  I want to be challenged and even broken by the Lord and spending concentrated time in the Word is the best way I know to do that.  Not because it's the right thing to do or because I think God will love me more if I read His Word.  But because I need it and I need Him. Period.
Even though this hasn't been my year for studying and preparing Bible studies and meditating on Scripture, God is faithful.  He has still taken the time I have spent, and He has pressed into my heart a few truths that I need to hear.  (I hope to share some of those things here soon. )
2 Timothy 3:16-17

All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, 17 so that the servant of God[a] may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.

He can do big things with the scraps that I have - think five loaves and two fish.  So while I hope and ask you to pray that I get deeper in the Word next year, ALL of the Word is valuable and I know that He can change my heart even when I fall short of my goals.

Item one - Exercise

Getting more exercise has been on my list of goals for at least four and a half years now.  Truly, I think it makes the list of weekly goals every single week.
I think, "This Monday, I'll wake up and I'll make it happen.  This is the week."
And then Monday morning happens.  Usually one child or another wakes up thirty minutes before normal, or right as I am getting started.
And I know all of you may be able to exercise with your children.  Not me.  I try to do sit ups and my baby toddles on over to sit on top of me and bounce up and down on my stomach thinking I'm playing a game. Or just ask me every 15 seconds when I can get breakfast ready.
I'm not even setting really steep goals for myself here.  Three days a week, I would like to stretch, do abs, stretch cords and anything else I can do inside my house.  Thirty minutes a day.  Heck, I'd settle for fifteen minutes a day!  Which is really embarassing when I have had long seasons of my life working out between 20 and 30 hours a week.  I don't think I have worked out more than 20 hours in the last four years combined.  The most exercise I got last week was wrestling with Kyrie to try to clip her fingernails.
      This fall, we talked about getting a new gym membership.  I dropped the Y, because while it was great to get out and work out, I couldn't get comfortable with the childcare options there, and I ended up paying and never going.   Then I was pregnant and had a baby, and that knocked exercise out for a while.  Lots of women can stay in shape and even get in shape while pregnant.  Not me.  I was getting winded just unloading the dishwasher.  Time on an eliptical machine would have killed me. Plus, my back only caused me trouble after exercise, so working out quickly fell of the list.
     But now?  What is my excuse?  Well, the new gym opportunity would have made exercise available 24 hours a day.  But, Really?  Who goes to exercise at 2:00 a.m.?  I don't think I want to be there with those people - for so many reasons.
     You might say, "Go before your kids are awake."  And I would tell you that first of all I made myself a promise every morning from highschool through college that I would never make myself work out at 5:30 in the morning again once it was in my power to avoid it.  On top of that, our garage is right beneath my daughter's bedroom.  If she hears it while she is in bed and thinks I'm leaving, she gets up and runs crying to the door to catch me and tell me she doesn't want me to leave.  And then never gets back to sleep.
     So a morning workout out of the house is not a good option right now.
     What about evening?  Forget the fact that I am exhausted by the end of the day.  Once the kids are in bed, I am ready to spend time with my husband and get things done I couldn't during the day.  And doesn't it cause sleep problems to work out late at night?  Also, see above garage door situation.
      All that to say, I still long to be in shape again and I miss the enjoyment and stress release that exercise provides.  I will keep trying to figure this one out since it is so important for me physically and mentally, and I want to be an example to my girls.  But right now, it's tough. Maybe I should just change "clipping the girls' fingernails" to my new workout goal, and then I'd be doing great!
How do you make working out work?

2010- How am I doing, so far?

I have a list of my goals for 2010 in my desk drawer.  You might call them resolutions, but I prefer goals. A few times, I have glanced back at this list that I wrote in January, and I usually shut the drawer quickly while shaking my head.  You see, I haven't done as much I as I wanted.  I have been quite busy this year, and I believe I am slowly changing some habits, but for the most part, I am not doing what is on the list.  Many of the things are surface-level, daily habit kind of things, but some of them really involve my heart if I am sincere in pursuing them.

Here are some examples of things I wanted to do better this year.

Exercise.  I had written a weekly schedule of physical activity that, honestly, is very manageable.
Bible Study - be more contemplative, meditate on verses, pray more through Scripture. Possibly use the Fighter Verse set that I have to memorize more Scripture.
Read/ Study - read every night before bed
Write - journal, blog, write reviews of what I read, write papers on what I am studying (because I am a nerd who thinks writing papers is fun.)
Food/Diet - have a plan for the week, move toward more whole foods.
Sabbath - make a true effort to rest, sit down. Have easy meals for that day.
School / Activities - begin to have a plan for crafts, activities and school for my girls.

As I look at this list, it is not far from the list I made in 2007 that I found in my desk drawer this afternoon:
Read
Write
Exercise
Cook at least 3 times a week
Plan menus
Connect with friends and neighbors on a regular basis

Is it sad to anyone else that I keep setting the same goals for myself (or similar ones) ?
Does that mean I am not really wanting to change?  I don't want to just give lip service to change while remaining in the same patterns of living.

Do you make lists of yearly goals?  Do your lists change much from year to year?  Are there habits you would like to change?  How is it going?  I'll write more soon to tell you more specifically how it's going with me.